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Dinner

Stronger Together

By November 4, 201640 Comments


Come over for some love and meatballs
, I wrote without really even thinking. There had been a sudden death in my friendโ€™s family and in situations like this, itโ€™s hard to think of anything else to offer. At least we can feed him when heโ€™s back in town. It didnโ€™t feel like a lot, but it was something. And something is definitely something.

He was grateful. As his wife told me later, โ€œre-entryโ€ to normal life is hard, to put it mildly, and a meatball dinner with friends was a good on-ramp back to reality and reengagement. (A little wine helps, too.) I was glad to hear it. After writing about dinner for six and a half years, I donโ€™t know why it comes as a surprise to me that a pot of turkey meatballs can be about so muchย moreย than a pot of turkey meatballs. If you think about it, a bowl of them with pasta and good Parmโ€ฆitโ€™s kind of the answer to everything.

The truth is, the meal was good for me, too. In the middle of one of the most divisive elections of my lifetime,ย it felt good to connect with people on a meaningful level, to put our radioactive phones down for a bit, to be reminded of the importance of community and togetherness. As you can probably tell, I try to keep politics out of this space, because I know a lot of you come here for an escape or, more likely, for easy chicken recipes, but like the rest of the world, Iโ€™ve been pretty worried โ€“ okay, wracked with anxiety โ€” about whatโ€™s going to happen onย November 8. I realize Iโ€™m not alone in this, but this election hasย dominatedย our dinner table conversation for the past six months.ย At our table, a space where weโ€™ve done our best to preach kindness, inclusiveness, and compassion, weโ€™ve found ourselves talking about the polarized state of this country, about racism and sexism and the unwanted grabbing of body parts, about what a leap forward it would be to have a woman in the White House for once, and about the toxicity of divisiveness โ€” notably after my 14 year-old daughterโ€™s โ€œIโ€™m with herโ€ button was stolen off of her backpack, and another time after our then-12 year-old commented on an HRC Instagram post only to be faced with a barrage of decidedly grown-up hate, including โ€œHillary doesnโ€™t give a sh*t about you!โ€ย (Teachable moment! Donโ€™t Engage Ever!)

Everyone in my house and my friend circle seems to have spent the better part of the past year obsessing over polls and studying color-coded electoral maps, and, in the face of everything we know about the internet, following the threads of insanely vitriolic twitter and Facebook wars. No matter what side youโ€™re on, I imagine you can relate. I, for one, am exhausted.

In light of this, todayโ€™s Friday Reading Round-up is focusing on the opposite of divisiveness: Dinner, community, and, for good measure, meatballs. Donโ€™t forget to vote.

The Power of a Dinner Table

The Power of a โ€œplayborhood.โ€

Oldie but goodie:ย Friday Night Meatballs: How to Change Your Life with Pasta

We get together to have dinner. And I donโ€™t mean โ€˜go outโ€™ for dinner. I mean โ€˜get together.โ€™

Pasta Night with the Neighborsย (Page 226, Dinner: A Love Story)

Five Rules for Hosting a Crappy Dinner Party

Great Grandma Turanoโ€™s Meatballs

Cider-braised Meatballsย (also in How to Celebrate Everything for book owners)


#hillz

Jenny

40 Comments

  • Avatar Andy Ward says:

    This is my favorite post ever.

  • Avatar Sarah P. says:

    Hi Jenny โ€“ thank you for this post. I have two daughters, and though the presidential choice seems to be extremely clear to them at their young age, I still have told them to keep their political views private! We, too, have been riddled with anxiety! I love your posts, recipes and books. How to Celebrate Everything is at the top of my birthday list!

  • Avatar CarrieH says:

    Great postโ€“letโ€™s all enjoy some food with our friends this weekend and leave the politics โ€œout there.โ€

  • Avatar Megan says:

    Weโ€™re having people over for meatballs tonight, Great Grandma Turanoโ€™s in fact! Thanks for this important reminder.

  • Avatar Karen says:

    Love this post! Thank you for saying thisโ€ฆ and suggesting meatballs. I love coming here for dinner inspiration and some sanity in this crazy mixed-up internet world.

  • Avatar Linda says:

    Longtime reader, first time commenter. Thank you for putting into words my anxieties and feelings. Us grandparents are so concerned for our grandchildrensโ€™ futures. A Grandmother as President would be wonderful! Thank you again.

  • Avatar Liz says:

    Thank you for this post today. Itโ€™s perfect. Deep breaths.

  • Avatar Sue A. says:

    Thank you for this important message and for using your website to spread this vital idea. I appreciate your strong stand.

  • Avatar Tina says:

    Thank you so much for this post! I feel that anyone with any public platform needs to be supporting her right now. Also โ€“ your meatball recipe is bonkers. Always a hit when I make it.

  • Avatar Sarah says:

    Thank you, thank you! Yes, I come for the recipes. But I come back, over and over, for the overall message of honesty and acceptance and love. #imwithher

  • Avatar Uncle Earl says:

    Beautiful. Authentic. Pure. Tears.

  • Avatar Heather says:

    Love this website, and your post! Thank you!

  • Avatar Jennifer says:

    Thank you so much for sharing โ€“ I love this post.

  • Avatar Kate says:

    Thank you, Jenny. May we all make it to Tuesday in one piece and with a few more satisfying dinners under our belt.

    Actually stepping away from oneโ€™s phone (and 538) and doing something feels really good, too. Knocking on doors or making calls and asking people to get out and vote is some of the easiest, most satisfying and most effective election work there is. And you get to know your community in a whole new way. Food for thought, everyone!

  • Avatar Darcie says:

    Do you follow Caissie St. Onge on Facebook? (TV producer, author, comedy writer) On Nov. 1st, she posted an amazing Thanksgiving dinner invitation on her page, welcoming pretty much everybody. I know youโ€™d dig it.

  • Avatar Allison says:

    Yes, Jenny! Thanks for being brave enough to write about this! I feel like Iโ€™ve been holding my breath , just waiting for it to be over. It was a sad day when I decided the debate might be inappropriate for my 8 year old to watch. Meatballs might be just the thing.

  • Avatar marianne says:

    Thank you Jenny, you have put into words EVERYTHING we have been thinking and feeling. The anxiety has been overwhelming because I feel like even if we/she wins we will lose to the hate, obstructionism and divisiveness. I wish it would be over Tuesday but I donโ€™t think it will be unfortunately. I have a 27 year old daughter who is so overcome with anxiety over this. Just unbelievable after the optimism and idealism we all felt 8 and 4 years ago. And I have seen a lot of elections in my lifetime and have never felt like this, even watching the Bush v. Gore debacle play out. I thought then this is as bad as it could get. Boy was I wrong. God help us and bless us all. Iโ€™m gonna go make a pot of meatballs nowโ€ฆ.

  • Avatar marianne says:

    P.S. Long time reader, first time poster and owner of all your great books!

  • Avatar JessicaD says:

    Iโ€™ve bought all of your cookbooks, but donโ€™t cook (but my husband and daughter do). Buy frozen meatballs, but believe so strongly in family dinners. So sorry your daughterโ€™s button was stolen, but love that she wore it. Love your shirts. Ours just arrived in the mail and Iโ€™ve been sending Hillary $$ weekly. Not sure how to close, except to say that I love, love, love this post! xoxo โ€“ Jessica

  • Maureen @Raising The Capable Student says:

    My college kids came back to NC to vote last night. A group of NC kids drove back together, voted, and then came to our house for meatballs and spaghetti! We had a wonderful conversation about voting and civic duty. It restored my hope for the future.

  • Avatar Sarah says:

    Love your blog, love your books (have three and my son calls them the jenny cookbooks), but may love this post most of all! It was an important one, thank you!

  • Allison says:

    Love the idea of old-fashioned โ€œplayโ€bourhoods. Too bad the guy featured in the article sounds intensely sexist.

  • Avatar Hilary says:

    While I donโ€™t support Hillary (or Trump), because of some experiences of her from time working in DC, I do support the magic of gathering people around the table and feeding and loving them. I hope this election teaches us that the government shall not be the source of goodness or change in our lives. WE shall be the sourceโ€“as we always have been. It seems to me that every four years, we forget that while our leaders influence our lives, theyโ€™re not our saving grace, and the fixation on DC makes us forget that we have power in our own neighborhoods and schools and churches to love well and practically: feed hungry people, donate to organizations in our communities that need resources to help the poor or disenfranchised, call your local school and ask the principal what they need, etc. Yes to meatballs and comfort and making extra space at the table for people who need it.

  • Avatar K. Whitney says:

    Thanks for your article, Iโ€m with her too! Go Hillary!

  • Avatar Michelle says:

    I was about to applaud the decision to refrain from discussing politics, but celebrated to soon. Seems like everywhere you look these days there is no escape from politics. However, I really enjoy your posts and this website is definitely an escape from the stress of everyday life. Thank you for that! Like everyone, I am anxious about this election, but unlike the majority of posts here I am definitely not with Clinton (or Trump). It seems like no matter which of the duopoly candidates win, itโ€™s going to be a very long, anxiety-filled next four years and itโ€™s going to take someone much stronger than Trump or Clinton to heal the divisiveness in our nation and restore the integrity of our electoral system.

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