
I wanted to post a Friday note with some personal news. My father-in-law, Stephen Ward, died last week; he was 81. Though many of you have only recently โmetโ me through my newsletter and books, Iโve been writing for over a decade about my family here on this blog, and I just wanted to touch on loss, something that affects, and will affect, all of us eventually.
Steve was a warm, big-hearted, loving husband, brother, father and grandfather and Iโll never forget one of the first times I met him, at Andyโs college graduation, when he broke out a toast in iambic pentameter that was as good as anything I had just studied in my American Poetry class. (I remember thinking, โNowย thisย is a family Iโd like to be a part of.โ) Steve was so funny and smart andย humble. As Andy wrote inย this obituary: โHe was a man of deep intellectual gifts, and a profound inability to take himself too seriously. The things he achieved in life, and the breadth of the knowledge he accrued, were not in service of some need to be important; they were simply the manifestation of his bottomless curiosity and the high standards to which he held himself.โ
Longtime readers of Dinner: A Love Story might recall Steveโs cameo on the blog,ย sharing memories from his days working as a โsoda jerkโย on the Jersey Shore; or Andyโs Fatherโs Day ode to the only dinner Steve would ever cook for his family โ the famously secret โDadoo Special.โ And hopefully you remember those poems. He wrote them for birthdays, anniversaries, weddings, Valentines Day (his wife of 59 years could publish a book of them) and in the process taught me the special importance of marking an occasion with words. I wrote about his poetry ritual in my last book,ย and you can read it here.ย
We will miss him so much and I am overwhelmed by the urge to have as many people know about him as possible. Thank you for reading.

One More Thing
Andy, his brother, Tony, Tonyโs wife Trish, and I have been with Andyโs mom, Emily, for the past few weeks, helping her get through all of this, and of course, cooking for her. On one of those occasions, Andy was charged with making her something using only what was in her pantry, without a whole lot of fresh stuff to work with. In short order, he discovered a bag of frozen vegetable-rice mixture (procured at Whole Foods), and, in the absence of fresh aromatics, hunted around in the somewhat dusty spice drawer see how he might kick it up. Turns out, even dried minced onions and ground ginger (however old those bottles are) arenโt so bad when youโre in a pinch. He added an egg and some soy sauce and I found myself walking past the skillet again and again to sneak a bite of the crispy rice clusters mixed with salty egg. Comfort food at its best. It was so good, we asked him to make it for the caretaking crew a few nights later.

Quickest Vegetable Fried Rice
Serves 2-3
3 tablespoons neutral oil (vegetable, canola, or olive oil if thatโs what you have)
1 20-ounce bag frozen vegetable-rice mix (as shown in photo), thawed for minimum 10 minutes
2 teaspoons minced onions/onion powder (or 3 tablespoon finely diced yellow onion)
1 tablespoon ginger powder (or 1-inch piece fresh ginger, peeled and finely minced)
3 eggs, whisked
2 tablespoons soy sauce (plus more for serving)
hot sauce (optional)
Add oil to a large nonstick skillet set over medium-high heat. Add rice in as even a layer as you can and let sit for 4-5 minutes, to allow for crispy rice clusters to form. Turn heat down to medium, add ginger and onions, then toss a bit. (If using fresh onions and ginger, let them cook about 2-3 minutes.) Clear a nice little space in the middle of the pan and add eggs, stirring as they cook, and gradually stirring them in to the surrounding rice. Once eggs are just cooked, drizzle soy sauce all over, toss and serve hot. Add hot sauce if desired.
Iโm so sorry, Jenny + family. Thank you for sharing a bit about your father in law. He seems like he was a wonderful man.
What a lovely tribute. I am sorry for your loss. May you all be comforted by your happy memories.
I am so terribly sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing him with us. May his memory be a blessing.
I am so sorry to hear of Andyโs fatherโs passing. Your affectionate tales of him over the years are a testament to his talents and generosity of spirit. How pleased he must have been to gain a daughter-in-law with her own love of language. May his memory be a blessing to you all.
Lovely memories of a special person so very sorry for your loss and your families. Thanks for easy stir fry recipe I will save for the days Iโm low on supplies I seem to always have left over rice in freezer and frozen vegetables great way to use up bits of left over bits.
Again my sincere condolences for your loss.
Iโm so very sorry for your loss. He sounds like such an amazing person! Thank you for sharing this with us.
May his memory be a blessing and a comfort to you and your family.
Iโm so sorry for your loss. No matter the age that our love ones pass it never feels like enough.
What a beautiful tribute to an incredible man, by all accounts. That poem he wrote to Emily had me in tears! Such a profound loss! Deepest condolences.
Iโm sorry for your familyโs loss. Glad you shared so many wonderful times through the years and expressed your love for each other all along the way. No life, no matter how full and well-lived, is quite long enough. Prayers, blessings, and peace.
Iโm so sorry for your loss!
Iโm so sorry! What a beautiful thing to truly love your in-laws and to notice it!