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Books, Gifts, CultureRituals

My Favorite Thing to Give

By October 4, 2017April 5th, 2022368 Comments

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When I was a kid, my family had an account at the local bookstore, a privilege I donโ€™t remember enjoying anywhere else in town. I felt so cool stopping in, picking up the latest V.C. Andrews novel, then then telling whoever was working behind the counter, Just charge it to โ€œRosenstrach.โ€ I never felt guilty piling two or three on the counter at once, something that wouldโ€™ve been unimaginable with, say, Ton Sur Ton sweatshirts at the trendy clothing store down the street. I like to think thatโ€™s why, to this day, I am like Daddy Warbucks when it comes to buying books, constantly ordering them for friends and family (sometimes even strangers) for just about any occasion, with a recklessness that doesnโ€™t reveal itself in any other part of my budgetary life. I think itโ€™s because handing someone a book with a personal note feels like Iโ€™m making a connection that might otherwise be nonexistent or difficult or elusive. I thought of you the whole time I read thisโ€ฆI know youโ€™re going through a lot, maybe this book will helpโ€ฆThis cookbook is a good resource next time you are having your in-laws for dinnerโ€ฆI read this book to my baby when she was your babyโ€™s ageโ€ฆI like this book, I know you will too. Here are the books Iโ€™ve handed out in the past three months (and one that Phoebe has handed out) that I think you might like to know about. Longtime blog readers will definitely recognize a few.

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Book: The Important Book, by Margaret Wise Brown
Why I Love It: Itโ€™s the lesser known, but equally poetic cousin to Goodnight Moon โ€”ย a picture book explaining the essence of, the importanceย of, seemingly everyday objects apples, spoons, wind, grass.
Why I Gave It: Every now and then I will fill in for editors who are on maternity leave and itโ€™s become something of a ritual for me to leave this behind for the mom when she returns to her desk. Iโ€™m always tempted to leave it with the note โ€œIโ€™m so jealous!โ€ conveniently over-romanticizing life with a newborn.

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Book
: Logo Type, Michael Evamy
Why I Love It: Because it tells the story behind the creation of famous logos, from Google to YouTube to Barneys New York to MoMA to FedEx to Crate & Barrel.
Why I Gave It: Because my workshare colleague Christy is a design genius and I knew sheโ€™d pore over it like I did. (As a thank-you, she forwarded me the SNL Papyrus skit. #TypographyNerdsUnite.)


Book
: Modern Jewish Cooking, by Leah Koenig
Why I Love It: My affection for this book has been recently and substantially chronicled. (Exhibit A: Last Weekโ€™s Fattoush, Exhibit B: Last Yearโ€™s Roast Chicken with Fennel and Orange.)
Why I Gave It: When my sister calls me to ask for advice on menu planning for Passover, Yom Kippur, Chanukah, Shabbat, what do you think I do first? I reach for Koenigโ€™s book in my library. I thought maybe it was finally time for her to have her own.

***TEEN-AGE EDITION***
Book
: Milk & Honey, by Rupi Kaur, given by my 15-year-old to a friend
Why Phoebe Loves It: (This is from Phoebe) โ€œItโ€™s a collection* of poems with a lot of feminine empowerment and a lot of resonating lines, such as โ€˜The person who you love should complement you, not complete you.โ€™ They stay with me.โ€ [*My edit: โ€œa MEGA-SELLING collectionโ€] Whyย Phoebe Gave It: โ€œI gave it to my friend who seemed like she was heading down a spiral of self-deprecation, and it was over a boy, which wasnโ€™t like her at all.โ€
Note from Phoebeโ€™s Mom: Please thumb through this before handing off to a teen-ager. There is sex talk โ€” not gratuitous or raunchy โ€” but itโ€™s there.


Book:
Dinner: The Playbook, by Yours Truly
Why I Love It: Because, in some ways, it was the easiest and most fun book for me to write of all three in the Dinner: A Love Story trilogy. Minimal storytelling but maximum strategizing for rolling up sleeves and making family dinner happen in the real world.
Why I Gave It: Because I was at a cross-country meet, speaking with another dinner-struggling mom, who said โ€œIโ€™m not like you, Iโ€™m not a professional chef, and I can only cook things if they are easy.โ€ To which I of course responded, โ€œI am in fact the opposite of a professional chef. I am a home cook and my books are written for people like you, who want to simplify as much as possible and still eat well.โ€ When I started describing a few of the recipes in Playbook (roast salmon with spicy mayo and chives, spaghetti with roasted cauliflower and breadcrumbs, cornmeal crusted fish with minty peas) it seemed like they were resonating, so I sent her a copy via my favorite messenger method: through the kidsโ€™ backpacks.

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Book:
Pizza Camp, Joe Beddia
Why I Love It: Refresh your memory with this love letter I wrote back in the spring. Itโ€™s no secret that we love pizza in our house, and this book, by the Philadelphia king upped our game in a serious way. (I will never use cooked sauce on a pie again.)
Why I Gave It: A guy in my exercise class at the gym makes pizza dough for a living! In between burpees and squats, we talk about his favorite pizza recipes, my favorite pizza recipes, our favorite Italian American haunts in Westchester, and other joyous topics to take our minds of the pain. I knew heโ€™d love Beddia.


Book
: In the Lake of the Woods, by Tim Oโ€™Brien
Why I Love It: I read it so long ago, when I was in the grips of a powerful Tim Oโ€™Brien obsession, but the basic storyline centers on, of course, a Vietnam War vet, running for office and struggling with the violence of his past.
Why I Gave It: Who else was riveted by PBSโ€™s documentary last week, The Vietnam War? (For those of you who havenโ€™t watched: Itโ€™s a commitment, but it is astonishing.) Tim Oโ€™Brien was one of the vets interviewed, and in the very last moments of the 10-part series, he read passages from The Things They Carried, which is pretty solidly cemented in my All Time Favorite Top Ten Books. Since I had already given that one to Phoebe, who properly and dutifully revered it, too, I tracked down this one for her as a follow-up. (And then I promptly re-read The Things for the millionth time.)


Book:
Deceptively Delicious, by Jessica Seinfeld.
Why I Love It: When this book came out, I actually didnโ€™t love it. Seinfeld made the case for disguising vegetables and other nutritious elements in traditionally kid-friendly foods like brownies and mac and cheese. I was outraged along with a lot of other new moms: Kids should learn to love and recognize broccoli! If we accommodate their dislikes and validate their fears, how will they ever learn to make healthy choices for themselves?!ย Yeah yeah yeah, whatevs. That was 2008, and Iโ€™ve been around the block since then. Kids are tricky when it comes to eating โ€” understatement of the year โ€” and hereโ€™s the operative concept: They are not all the same. If parents are wracked with anxiety about their childโ€™s diet and hiding kale in the kidโ€™s meatballs is going to bring some measure of peaceโ€ฆwho am I to tell them to do anything different?
Why I Gave it: My friend Christina, who has two pre-school-age kids, told me recently that she discovered a neat trick for getting her kids to eat better: she sneaks greens into their favorite foods without them knowing it. โ€œOh, like the Jessica Seinfeld book!โ€ I said. โ€œWho?โ€ She replied. Of course I was forced to respond how I hate to respond: โ€œWell, back in the day, when I had young kidsโ€ฆโ€ then I one-clicked Deceptively Delicious for her.


Book:
Tell Me More: And 11 Other Important Things Iโ€™m Learning to Say, by Kelly Corrigan
Why I Love It: Fans of Corriganโ€™s essays, or any of her bestselling books (likeย The Middle Place), alreadyย know that she has a gift for observation, finding humor and meaning everywhere she looks, ultimately forcing you do the same. But this bookโ€ฆit blew me away. Tell Me More is a collection of essays touches on every issue I stay up at night thinking about: raising teen-agers, dealing with aging parents, confronting regrets and loss and death.
Why I Gave It:ย 
One of my more favorite rituals is a weekly-ish power walk with my friend, Naria. She is the worldโ€™s fastest walker, so I get a great workout, but mostly I look forward to our conversations. ย When we walk, we talk. About everything. About raising daughters, dealing with aging parents, confronting regrets and loss and death. See? I had no other choice than to drop off Tell Me More on her doorstep yesterday.

****Why Iโ€™ll Give it Again, aka A GIVEAWAY:ย Corriganโ€™s book is not published until January but it just so happens that I know an editor at Random House who can score some advanced reader editions for us. (Which might even be better than having an account at the local bookstore.) Comment below for your chance to win two copies, one for your own reading pleasure and one to give to a friend who you think might need it most. Contest ends Friday 10/6 at noon ET. UPDATE: The winner has been notified. Thanks to everyone for playing!

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368 Comments

  • Avatar JadeGrande says:

    Iโ€™d love the Kelly Corrigan book!
    I also love giving books. I was at a book reading last night, and each book sale included a donation (by a third party) toward refugees. So we all bought extra books for friends. Win win!
    But Jenny, please, no more โ€œone clickingโ€. Itโ€™s fun to schlep to the bookstore, and they count on us bookish types to keep them solvent. Amazon will leave us with empty storefronts and no opportunity for browsing and serendipitous discoveries. I actually found your first book at the local bookstore, before it caught on โ€” on display and recommended!

  • Avatar Carrie says:

    Loved this post, Jennyโ€“and I love buying books for people, too!

  • Avatar Elise says:

    How to Celebrate Everything is my favorite book of yours to give as a gift!

  • Avatar Jami Zinkiewicz says:

    Would love to win a copy!

  • Avatar Tina says:

    Would love to read this book.

  • Avatar MAR says:

    Jenny,
    These sound like great books, especially Pizza Camp. However, Iโ€™ll take this opportunity to thank you for your long ago recommendation of What I Talk About When I Talk About Running by Haruki Murakami. I have shared that book with many people. It got me off the couch and running/walking again. It changed my whole perspective about long, solitary runs or walks. Suddenly, I had so much more think about during these times and many more new things to notice even on the most familiar of routes. And, I discovered Haruki Murakami as a new author to read. So, from one book lover to another, thanks for your suggestions. Please keep them coming

  • Avatar sara says:

    I love Kelly Corrigan!

  • Avatar Megan says:

    I would love to read this book and give this book โ€“ it will just be hard to choose which deserving pal!

  • Avatar Lisa Winslow says:

    Would love to read โ€œTell Me Moreโ€โ€ฆalways on the lookout for great book recoโ€™s!

  • Kelsey says:

    My friend Daniel and I have a two person book club. We meet in a different bar every month and discuss the book and Danielโ€™s dating life, and the kids on our caseload, and feminism and itโ€™s amazing. Totally a crucial piece of my self care (Iโ€™m a social worker). Iโ€™d choose the Corrigan book for book club, give my second copy to Danielโ€ฆand my copy will go to my mom when Iโ€™m through! Thanks for being a delight, Jenny!

  • Meghann says:

    Great post today

  • Avatar Rebecca Schulz says:

    An account at a bookstore? What a dream.

  • Avatar SusaninSuburbia says:

    Loved this post, thank you! Books are the best.

  • Avatar Niki M says:

    Love love love your passion for reading and that our interests are so in line. When you share your favorite books it is always a must-read-all-the-way-to -the-end for me! And Iโ€™m so glad I did because the new book by Corrigan looks incredibly powerful and I would love to give a copy to my mom who is mourning the loss of her beloved husband, my step-father, while navigating the final stages of parenting two children in college on her own. He passed away last month and I canโ€™t think of a better way to say โ€œIโ€™m here for youโ€ then the quiet love of a meaningful book.

  • Avatar Kyle says:

    I work at a high school, and give books to my graduating advisees. The Things They Carried has been a favorite, and Iโ€™m definitely adding Milk and Honey to the list this year! I havenโ€™t read Corrigan and would love to!

  • Avatar Amy says:

    Books are my weakness! Would love to share Kellyโ€™s new book with my best friend!

  • Avatar BARBARA SHORNICK says:

    This is a great list!

  • Avatar Sara says:

    I want to read Tell Me Moreโ€ฆ..a kindergarten teacher I work with uses these words a lot. It has taught me to stop and listen, rather than to immediately correct my own kids for various transgressions. Iโ€™ve learned a lot about the way my kids think with this technique, Sounds like this book would have some of those mind-shifting insights,

  • Avatar Nadia says:

    I love th format of the postโ€ฆwhy I love it/why I gave it/Why Iโ€™ll give it again!!!

  • Avatar Julie says:

    When my daughter was suffering through an eating disorder, one friend in particular checked in with me every few days without fail. She listened to my fears and worryโ€“and made sure I knew I wasnโ€™t alone. I will never forget how much her caring helped me. Now when friends go through their own struggles, I try to make them feel just as connected. It sounds like โ€œTell Me Moreโ€ will be a new favorite.

  • Avatar Amy H says:

    I love, love, love when you post book recommendations! Iโ€™ve added several from this post to my list. One of my favorites to gift moms of all ages is Catherine Newmanโ€™s Catastrophic Happiness. I just ordered a copy for a friend. ๐Ÿ™‚

  • Avatar Elizabeth says:

    Already have a friend in mind if Iโ€™m the lucky winner!

  • Avatar N. Rogers says:

    Would love to win this!

  • Avatar Emily says:

    I am an English teacher and this post really resonated with me. I love sharing my favorite books and getting to watch them impact my students and friends as much as they did for me.

  • Avatar Lori Schwartz says:

    Wow, what a list! And I devour Kelly Corrigan. I was in the middle place and read it at the perfect time in my life.

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