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Books, Gifts, CultureRituals

My Favorite Thing to Give

By October 4, 2017April 5th, 2022368 Comments

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When I was a kid, my family had an account at the local bookstore, a privilege I donโ€™t remember enjoying anywhere else in town. I felt so cool stopping in, picking up the latest V.C. Andrews novel, then then telling whoever was working behind the counter, Just charge it to โ€œRosenstrach.โ€ I never felt guilty piling two or three on the counter at once, something that wouldโ€™ve been unimaginable with, say, Ton Sur Ton sweatshirts at the trendy clothing store down the street. I like to think thatโ€™s why, to this day, I am like Daddy Warbucks when it comes to buying books, constantly ordering them for friends and family (sometimes even strangers) for just about any occasion, with a recklessness that doesnโ€™t reveal itself in any other part of my budgetary life. I think itโ€™s because handing someone a book with a personal note feels like Iโ€™m making a connection that might otherwise be nonexistent or difficult or elusive. I thought of you the whole time I read thisโ€ฆI know youโ€™re going through a lot, maybe this book will helpโ€ฆThis cookbook is a good resource next time you are having your in-laws for dinnerโ€ฆI read this book to my baby when she was your babyโ€™s ageโ€ฆI like this book, I know you will too. Here are the books Iโ€™ve handed out in the past three months (and one that Phoebe has handed out) that I think you might like to know about. Longtime blog readers will definitely recognize a few.

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Book: The Important Book, by Margaret Wise Brown
Why I Love It: Itโ€™s the lesser known, but equally poetic cousin to Goodnight Moon โ€”ย a picture book explaining the essence of, the importanceย of, seemingly everyday objects apples, spoons, wind, grass.
Why I Gave It: Every now and then I will fill in for editors who are on maternity leave and itโ€™s become something of a ritual for me to leave this behind for the mom when she returns to her desk. Iโ€™m always tempted to leave it with the note โ€œIโ€™m so jealous!โ€ conveniently over-romanticizing life with a newborn.

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Book
: Logo Type, Michael Evamy
Why I Love It: Because it tells the story behind the creation of famous logos, from Google to YouTube to Barneys New York to MoMA to FedEx to Crate & Barrel.
Why I Gave It: Because my workshare colleague Christy is a design genius and I knew sheโ€™d pore over it like I did. (As a thank-you, she forwarded me the SNL Papyrus skit. #TypographyNerdsUnite.)


Book
: Modern Jewish Cooking, by Leah Koenig
Why I Love It: My affection for this book has been recently and substantially chronicled. (Exhibit A: Last Weekโ€™s Fattoush, Exhibit B: Last Yearโ€™s Roast Chicken with Fennel and Orange.)
Why I Gave It: When my sister calls me to ask for advice on menu planning for Passover, Yom Kippur, Chanukah, Shabbat, what do you think I do first? I reach for Koenigโ€™s book in my library. I thought maybe it was finally time for her to have her own.

***TEEN-AGE EDITION***
Book
: Milk & Honey, by Rupi Kaur, given by my 15-year-old to a friend
Why Phoebe Loves It: (This is from Phoebe) โ€œItโ€™s a collection* of poems with a lot of feminine empowerment and a lot of resonating lines, such as โ€˜The person who you love should complement you, not complete you.โ€™ They stay with me.โ€ [*My edit: โ€œa MEGA-SELLING collectionโ€] Whyย Phoebe Gave It: โ€œI gave it to my friend who seemed like she was heading down a spiral of self-deprecation, and it was over a boy, which wasnโ€™t like her at all.โ€
Note from Phoebeโ€™s Mom: Please thumb through this before handing off to a teen-ager. There is sex talk โ€” not gratuitous or raunchy โ€” but itโ€™s there.


Book:
Dinner: The Playbook, by Yours Truly
Why I Love It: Because, in some ways, it was the easiest and most fun book for me to write of all three in the Dinner: A Love Story trilogy. Minimal storytelling but maximum strategizing for rolling up sleeves and making family dinner happen in the real world.
Why I Gave It: Because I was at a cross-country meet, speaking with another dinner-struggling mom, who said โ€œIโ€™m not like you, Iโ€™m not a professional chef, and I can only cook things if they are easy.โ€ To which I of course responded, โ€œI am in fact the opposite of a professional chef. I am a home cook and my books are written for people like you, who want to simplify as much as possible and still eat well.โ€ When I started describing a few of the recipes in Playbook (roast salmon with spicy mayo and chives, spaghetti with roasted cauliflower and breadcrumbs, cornmeal crusted fish with minty peas) it seemed like they were resonating, so I sent her a copy via my favorite messenger method: through the kidsโ€™ backpacks.

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Book:
Pizza Camp, Joe Beddia
Why I Love It: Refresh your memory with this love letter I wrote back in the spring. Itโ€™s no secret that we love pizza in our house, and this book, by the Philadelphia king upped our game in a serious way. (I will never use cooked sauce on a pie again.)
Why I Gave It: A guy in my exercise class at the gym makes pizza dough for a living! In between burpees and squats, we talk about his favorite pizza recipes, my favorite pizza recipes, our favorite Italian American haunts in Westchester, and other joyous topics to take our minds of the pain. I knew heโ€™d love Beddia.


Book
: In the Lake of the Woods, by Tim Oโ€™Brien
Why I Love It: I read it so long ago, when I was in the grips of a powerful Tim Oโ€™Brien obsession, but the basic storyline centers on, of course, a Vietnam War vet, running for office and struggling with the violence of his past.
Why I Gave It: Who else was riveted by PBSโ€™s documentary last week, The Vietnam War? (For those of you who havenโ€™t watched: Itโ€™s a commitment, but it is astonishing.) Tim Oโ€™Brien was one of the vets interviewed, and in the very last moments of the 10-part series, he read passages from The Things They Carried, which is pretty solidly cemented in my All Time Favorite Top Ten Books. Since I had already given that one to Phoebe, who properly and dutifully revered it, too, I tracked down this one for her as a follow-up. (And then I promptly re-read The Things for the millionth time.)


Book:
Deceptively Delicious, by Jessica Seinfeld.
Why I Love It: When this book came out, I actually didnโ€™t love it. Seinfeld made the case for disguising vegetables and other nutritious elements in traditionally kid-friendly foods like brownies and mac and cheese. I was outraged along with a lot of other new moms: Kids should learn to love and recognize broccoli! If we accommodate their dislikes and validate their fears, how will they ever learn to make healthy choices for themselves?!ย Yeah yeah yeah, whatevs. That was 2008, and Iโ€™ve been around the block since then. Kids are tricky when it comes to eating โ€” understatement of the year โ€” and hereโ€™s the operative concept: They are not all the same. If parents are wracked with anxiety about their childโ€™s diet and hiding kale in the kidโ€™s meatballs is going to bring some measure of peaceโ€ฆwho am I to tell them to do anything different?
Why I Gave it: My friend Christina, who has two pre-school-age kids, told me recently that she discovered a neat trick for getting her kids to eat better: she sneaks greens into their favorite foods without them knowing it. โ€œOh, like the Jessica Seinfeld book!โ€ I said. โ€œWho?โ€ She replied. Of course I was forced to respond how I hate to respond: โ€œWell, back in the day, when I had young kidsโ€ฆโ€ then I one-clicked Deceptively Delicious for her.


Book:
Tell Me More: And 11 Other Important Things Iโ€™m Learning to Say, by Kelly Corrigan
Why I Love It: Fans of Corriganโ€™s essays, or any of her bestselling books (likeย The Middle Place), alreadyย know that she has a gift for observation, finding humor and meaning everywhere she looks, ultimately forcing you do the same. But this bookโ€ฆit blew me away. Tell Me More is a collection of essays touches on every issue I stay up at night thinking about: raising teen-agers, dealing with aging parents, confronting regrets and loss and death.
Why I Gave It:ย 
One of my more favorite rituals is a weekly-ish power walk with my friend, Naria. She is the worldโ€™s fastest walker, so I get a great workout, but mostly I look forward to our conversations. ย When we walk, we talk. About everything. About raising daughters, dealing with aging parents, confronting regrets and loss and death. See? I had no other choice than to drop off Tell Me More on her doorstep yesterday.

****Why Iโ€™ll Give it Again, aka A GIVEAWAY:ย Corriganโ€™s book is not published until January but it just so happens that I know an editor at Random House who can score some advanced reader editions for us. (Which might even be better than having an account at the local bookstore.) Comment below for your chance to win two copies, one for your own reading pleasure and one to give to a friend who you think might need it most. Contest ends Friday 10/6 at noon ET. UPDATE: The winner has been notified. Thanks to everyone for playing!

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368 Comments

  • Avatar Sandi says:

    Thank you for the list, I love getting book recommendations. Need to add a few to my reading list.

  • Avatar Diane says:

    I would love to read this book!!!

  • Avatar Marie says:

    The bookstore I managed for 10 years also offered accounts for regulars. I always loved it when the kids would come in and put books on their parentsโ€™ accounts! Some were blasรฉ, but others always looked like they thought they were getting away with the grandest heist. Thanks for the reminder. xo M

  • Avatar Cynthia D. says:

    Looks like a keeper!

  • Kim says:

    I also love to give books, but when itโ€™s not a new release, I always worry that the person will have already read it! Itโ€™s tricky!

  • Avatar Lissa says:

    I have a weekly walk with a girlfriend too and it is lovely!

  • Avatar Lissa says:

    I have a weekly walk with a girlfriend too and it is lovely!!

  • Avatar Camille says:

    Iโ€™m also a book gift giver! Always feels great when I nail it and they tell me how it was the perfect thing they needed.

  • Avatar Kara says:

    The hardest but easiest thing to sayโ€ฆtell me more. Would love to read it.

  • Avatar M says:

    Definitely commenting for this! Your blog has led me to some of my very favorite books. In fact, it was only after reading a number edited by Andy that I realized I should start looking for books that share certain editors, the same way I might try wines based on who imports them. Canโ€™t wait to read this next one whether or not I win it!

  • Avatar Christina says:

    When it comes to books we have no budget in our house! This is such a great post โ€“ thank you for all of the GREAT recommendations.

  • Avatar Samantha says:

    I would love to get and give a copy of the Corrigan book. So exciting to have advance copies!

  • Avatar Melissa says:

    I love your blog and really look forward to your book recommendations. I have daughters ages 15 and 12 โ€“ your kids/teen book recs are the best! My 15 year old just read The Things They Carried โ€“ will have to order her the next one and look for the PBS series!

  • Avatar h says:

    I have so much trouble finishing books recently! Itโ€™s the shorter daysโ€ฆboo!โ€ฆbut also yay! fall!

  • Avatar Michele Jacques says:

    Books are the best gifts and I automatically gravitate toward people who get excited about them. People who donโ€™t read? Itโ€™s harder to connect.

  • Avatar Karen says:

    love Kelly Corrigan too! Hereโ€™s a story:
    I get Kellyโ€™s book club emails, and two summers ago she mentioned something abut going to a lacrosse tournament the next weekend. My daughter also had a lacrosse tournament, so I wrote back asking if by any cahnce it was the same one. I never expeced a response โ€“ I thought a marketing person sent this out en masse.
    Needless to say I was thrilled when Kelly responded and said, yes, she would be there. But then, sadly, I couldnโ€™t go beacause I had to do something with my son that weekend. My husband took my daughter, and she ended up playing Kellyโ€™s daughterโ€™s team. Honestly, I โ€˜m still kicking myself for not going.

  • Avatar Michele says:

    I would love to win this for my sister. She will be turning 50 in March and I think the essays would resonate with her.

  • Avatar Linda says:

    I love books!

  • Avatar NNT says:

    Always love your posts about books!

  • Avatar Barbara says:

    I love to give books and to get them, so if Iโ€™m lucky enough to win the drawing, itโ€™s the best of both worlds. This sounds like a great book!

  • Avatar Jeanne says:

    The Middle Place was one of my favorite books and came to me at a time in my life when I needed it. Canโ€™t wait to read another one of her books!

  • Avatar Maggie H. says:

    I love gifting books! I look forward to checking out your recommendations above. I recently purchased Modern Jewish Cooking and now I think my cookbook collections wonโ€™t be complete without Pizza Camp. (Yes, I have a book problem.)

  • Avatar Kate says:

    What a wonderful post!! Thank you! Books make such personal and lovely gifts. I would add: โ€œGreat With Childโ€ by Beth Ann Fennelly to the list of books to give a friend who is expecting! I would love to win the Corrigan books, sounds like required reading!

  • Avatar Jenne Parsons says:

    I love books that spark conversations! Iโ€™m especially interested in anything that helps me to connect with my 13-year-old daughter.

  • Kat says:

    Thank you for reminding me to send Dinner a Playbook to a friend! Books make the best gifts ๐Ÿ™‚

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