Phoebe was about four years old the first time she walked into a McDonaldโs. It was somewhere in Virginia, an I-95 pitstop on our annual 800-mile drive down to South Carolina from New York. I remember her wide-eyeballing the playground outside, the Wizard of Oz doll display inside. Before she had taken a single bite of food, she turned to me and said, โMom, this is the best restaurant Iโve ever been to.โ
It was terrifying how they got her. So efficiently! So insidiously!
We bought her a Happy Meal so she could get her Dorothy doll, then we took her and her sister to the bathroom to change them into their pajamas. The goal was for them to be stuffed and comfortable so they would fall asleep for the remaining 300 miles. It worked.
I read Fast Food Nation and all the rest of them, but somehow still lodged in my brain is a McDonalds chip that equates the golden arches with happy childhood memories โ heading to the drive-thru with my Dad to pick up a big order when my parents were going out and the sitter couldnโt cook, going after school with my best friend Jeni to scarf down a deep-fried apple pie before lacrosse practice.
As I said. Terrifying.
Itโs hard to justify eating there more than our once-a-year roadtrip pitstop, but the McDonaldโs happiness chip (and the better burger trend) had me experimenting with a Big Mac makeover recently. This is what I did:
- Replaced ground beef with dark ground turkey (and rolled them In-n-Out style as usual)
- Used whole wheat buns (For the middle layer, I used an extra bottom bun, sliced horizontally)
- Replaced American cheese with Trader Joeโs sharp cheddar slices
- Used organic ketchup, mustard, and mayo instead of โspecial sauceโ
- Had the grill been fired up, I would have flame-broiled the patties Burger-King-style, which my husband claims to this day is what makes BK home of the superior burger
- Garnished with a parasol instead of an action figure
What is the opposite of โsupersize?โ Whatever it is, I recommend doing that, too. Served with a salad and baked french fries (coming soon), one of these mega-burgers is good enough for four people.
Lovinโ it.
Related: McDonaldโs vs. Chipotle: Does the Big Mac Win?
holy guacamole! i am in love! and i am with you on the In-n-Out flat style burger. makes such a difference when you donโt have to un-hinge your jaw to eat a decent burger.
Love this โ that burger looks delish!!
And I totally agree about the McDโs happiness chip. I remember that so well from childhood. We didnโt get to go there often but when we didโฆ.total bliss!! Like you, we pretty much avoid McDโs like the plague but if we have to stop there on a road trip so be it.
holy guacamole! i am in love! and i am with you on the In-n-Out flat style burger. makes such a difference when you donโt have to un-hinge your jaw to eat a decent burger.